Call 540 672 5671  |  
Mon-Thur 8:30 am-5:30 pm; Fri 8:30-12:30 EST
Tell Of His Power

My Journey towards Forgiveness

I have learned that forgiveness is not something I need to manufacture for myself. Rather, I need to receive it directly from God as a free gift.

By Vanesa Esteche

Like too many young people these days, I grew up neglected in a dysfunctional and abusive home. I hated my father as I watched him abusing others and received his abuse myself. I hated him so much that before I reached my teen years, I wished him dead and vowed to make that happen. 

Needless to say, growing up in this environment left me with deep-rooted negative beliefs about myself. I’m not important, I’m not wanted, I’m alone, were thoughts that subconsciously governed my self-image. By the time I reached my twenties, I was convinced that I needed to live behind a mask. I felt sure that I could never let anyone know who I truly was because they would automatically reject me. 

I also needed to numb the pain of being me. I turned to parties, books, movies, food, pornography, alcohol, and relationships to

You have met your free view limit.
To access the full article, please login or subscribe. sikeres sportfogadás

Subscribe Today

Last Generation is a magazine for people seeking spiritual answers to the current issues of our times.

Your subscription will give you:

  • Immediate access to all web content, including archives as they are expanded
  • Special access to web-only articles
  • A 32-page copy of Last Generation Magazine delivered to your home 6 times a year*
Subscribe Today

*Digital-only subscriptions also available



.text-center{ text-align: center; } .paywall_row:after{ content: ''; display: block; clear: both; } @media (min-width: 768px){ .paywall_row > .paywall_span6{ float: left; width: 50%; -webkit-box-sizing: border-box; box-sizing: border-box; } } .paywall_row > .paywall_span6{ padding: 15px; } .paywall_container { background: #ffffff !important; margin:0px !important; margin-top: -23px !important; } .paywall-header img{max-width: 100%;} .paywall-header { background: #fff5d2; background: -moz-linear-gradient(left, rgba(255,250,240,1) 0%, rgba(255,245,210,1) 100%); background: -webkit-gradient(left top, right top, color-stop(0%, rgba(255,250,240,1)), color-stop(100%, rgba(255,245,210,1))); background: -webkit-linear-gradient(left, rgba(255,250,240,1) 0%, rgba(255,245,210,1) 100%); background: -o-linear-gradient(left, rgba(255,250,240,1) 0%, rgba(255,245,210,1) 100%); background: -ms-linear-gradient(left, rgba(255,250,240,1) 0%, rgba(255,245,210,1) 100%); background: linear-gradient(to right, rgba(255,250,240,1) 0%, rgba(255,245,210,1) 100%); filter: progid:DXImageTransform.Microsoft.gradient( startColorstr='#fffaf0', endColorstr='#fff5d2', GradientType=1 ); text-align: center; padding: 35px 1em; } .paywall_notice { background: #16aae3; background:#00aab4; color: #fff !important; padding: 15px !important; display: block; font-weight: 500 !important; text-align: center; font-size: 24px !important; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; line-height: 1.2; margin: 0; margin-bottom: 0.5em; } .paywall_login_header, .paywall_subscribe_header{ font-weight: 400 !important; font-size: 42px !important; margin: 0; line-height: 1.1em !important; margin-bottom: 15px !important; } .paywall_login_headline { margin: 0;margin-bottom: 2em; font-weight: 300 !important; color: #000 !important; font-size: 20px !important; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; line-height: 1 !important; } .paywall_login .form-shadow { box-shadow: none; font-size: 1em; border: 0; padding: 0; } .paywall_login form { border: 0; padding: 0; margin-top: 20px; } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms .form-shadow { box-shadow: none; padding: 0; margin: 0; } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms .form-border { padding: 0; margin: 0; } .paywall_login label { border: 0 !important; clip: rect(1px, 1px, 1px, 1px) !important; /* 1 */ -webkit-clip-path: inset(50%) !important; clip-path: inset(50%) !important; /* 2 */ height: 1px !important; margin: -1px !important; overflow: hidden !important; padding: 0 !important; position: absolute !important; width: 1px !important; white-space: nowrap !important; } .paywall_login label {} .paywall_login #dna_all_forms .input-group-addon { display: none; } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms .input-group { display: block; } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms .form-control { border-radius: 0; font-size: 16px; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; background: #fafafa; color: #000; height: auto; border: 0; box-shadow: none !important; outline: none; padding: 10px 12px; } .paywall_login ::-webkit-input-placeholder { color: #111;text-transform:uppercase;letter-spacing:1.2px; } .paywall_login :-ms-input-placeholder { color: #111;text-transform:uppercase;letter-spacing:1.2px; } .paywall_login ::placeholder { color: #111;text-transform:uppercase;letter-spacing:1.2px; } .paywall_login input[type="text"], .paywall_login input[type="password"] { height: 34px; } .paywall_login .input-group-addon { background-color: #fabd00; border-color: #deaa07; color: #fff; } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms input[type=submit] { max-width: 215px; margin-top: 8px; margin-bottom: -10px; color: #fff; background: #eb5a46; border-color: #eb5a46; text-transform: uppercase; transition: all 0.3s ease; text-shadow: none; font-size: inherit; line-height: 1; padding: 0.75em 1em; height: auto; border-radius: 0; border: 0 } .paywall_login #dna_all_forms input[type=submit]:hover, .paywall_login #dna_all_forms input[type=submit]:focus { color: #fff; background-color: #e27061; } .paywall_login a{ color: #9a9a9a; font-size: inherit; text-transform: uppercase; } .paywall_subscribe { line-height: 1.4; font-size: 0.9em; } .paywall_subscribe > p { color: #000 !important; margin-bottom: 10px !important; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; } .paywall_subscribe > p > small { font-size: 0.7em; } .benefits_list { margin: 0 0 1rem; padding: 0; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; } .benefits_list li { display: block; margin-bottom: 6px; color: #000 !important; } .tick_icon { margin-right: 0; width: 16px; display: inline-block; vertical-align: middle; } .tick_icon svg{ width: 100%; fill: #06aab3; } .btn.btn-subscribe { max-width: 215px; line-height: 1; margin: 0 auto; margin-top: 40px; padding: 0.75em 1em; color: #fff; background-color: #eb5a46; border-color: #eb5a46; text-transform: uppercase; border-radius: 0; transition: all 0.3s ease; font-family: 'Gill Sans Nova',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; display: block; text-align: center; border: 0 } .btn.btn-subscribe:hover, .btn.btn-subscribe:focus { color: #fff; background-color: #e27061; } .btn.btn-subscribe:focus { border-color: #0073aa; outline: 0; -webkit-box-shadow: 0 0 8px #0073aa; -moz-box-shadow: 0 0 8px #0073aa; box-shadow: 0 0 8px #0073aa; }

About the author

Vanesa Esteche volunteers at an international online prayer ministry that helps people know Jesus more deeply. When she’s not working, she loves going on adventures. The Bible principles that helped her towards her healing are summarized in the book, The Hidden Half of the Gospel, by Paul Coneff and Lindsey Gindke. Available at www.hiddenhalf.org 

mic